2003-09-18
afraid of the dark dreams
I'm bored to the bone. With the exception of James, my closest friends are all at least four hours away. Puh. And by closest, I mean the ones I talk to the most, not the ones I've known the longest.
Went to the job center today and filled out a four page form to look for jobs. All to no avail. I almost cried, but didn't want to in front of James. He always makes me feel better when I'm sad, anyway. I went to the library to check out Second Helpings, the sequel to my new favorite book, Sloppy Firsts. Oh, guess what. Not only had I forgotten slash lost my brand new library card, but after all that excitement, they don't even have Second Helpings. It's not checked out, they don't have it. Dammit. Sad, sad Lauren.
James is sick, and as result had been planning on going to his house and to bed as soon as he dropped me off, but he saw I was kinda down and offered to watch Cookie's Fortune with me, since it's due tomorrow. I liked it a lot, despite the fact that James was obviously crushing over Liv Tyler's short hair. Haha. Too bad I've been over my Robin (as in Batman and) phase for years, cuz Chris O'Donnel was in it, too. It was cute. And my new favorite redhead is in it, so I at least had some eye candy in it (haha; and I'm not talking about the little boy, smart alecks!).
I am now reading Jemima J. That book kept up popping up everywhere, so I finally broke down and decided to read it. The last time a similar circumstance lead me to read a book, it ended up being a favorite (Examples: Weetzie Bat, Sophie's World).
At any rate, Jemima J is so excited about the internet, that she inspired me to get online. She stumbled across a chatroom set up to get people to hook up, and is now talking to some guy in California (she's British). The book's enthusiasm about the internet was catching, and so I jumped online. I thought, 'Wow, if I didn't already have James, I'd meet someone online to date!' Then I thought wait, that's exactly how I met James, minus the chatroom. Hahaha. I'm so glad our meeting turned out so well (3 and a half months, what's up) instead of really, really badly and ending with one of us obsessed with the other. If the latter had happened, judging by our first date, he would have been stalking me. As it is, he's just my boyfriend. ((J/k James, you know I love you))
The internet really is great, I just need new things to do on it. Other than update my diaryland twice daily, that is. Haha.
A hurricane went through Virginia today. Here's praying Misty and Desiree are both okay. (1. Because I didn't catch the location of the storm and 2. I don't have long distance, which sucks enough)
Saturday is Desiree's birthday, and I've yet to find the perfect card. If I make one, I'm afraid it will get all messed up in the mail. Gahhhh. On my next birthday, I'm wishing for teleporation to become a cheap and easy reality. (yeah, right.)
And because I'm obsessed with dreams:
This morning I went back to sleep for an hour (set my alarm clock for 10 so I could call and wake James up) and had one of the creepiest dreams ever. I dreamt that I met up with all these people I went to high school with, and I was really shy, but apparently had a really great haircut. I started seeing all these people I graduated with (people I neither hung out with or liked), who all went out of their way to say hey, etc. It was really weird. This girl Malinda, whom I could only barely stand in the classes we had together, starts chatting me up, and we start going through some sort of hallway (not school-related, as the hall is white, and opens into a suburban neighborhood). I'm walking with Malinda, and this girl I used to be really good friends with in high school starts walking right behind us, and it's as if she and Malinda used to be bffs (though I don't think my ex-friend liked her at all in real life). So we're walking, Malinda and I in front, and this ex-friend on my heels, practically, into the daylight, out of this brightish hall. At any rate, during the dream, I started feeling really lightheaded and fuzzy, as if under certain chemical influences, if you will. When we were near the end of the hall, I got that floaty feeling I sometimes do in my dreams, where it feels like I'm in midair, floating in a backwards direction. I was afraid of falling, and willed myself awake. I woke up, and my room (which had been light when I took my nap) was pitch black. I looked over at my alarm clock, and at first I thought it said 3:00, but then I saw that it said 8:00. I was upset that I had somehow slept all day (why hadn't anyone woken me up? why hadn't James called? what was going on?), and jumped out of bed. I wrapped my blanket around me as I am prone to do upon awakening, and walked out of my room into the livingroom. As I did so, I heard the backdoor open, and one of my parents come home from work, and set their things down. I got to right in front of where the computer is set up, and for some unknown reason, fell flat on my face on the carpet. From a view outside my body I saw my own face, and what it would look like to an intruder. I could see inside the breakfast nook, that the light was on and someone was home. Then everything went black. Then I woke up for real. When I did wake up, I heard similar metallic noises like the ones from my dream (keys?), only they were real. And my room was not pitch-black. As soon as I sat up in bed, my alarm clock went off. I ran over, turned it off, then ventured off into the rest of the house, trying to figure out what the noise was. It truly sounded as if someone else was in my house, an idea I don't really cherish. I walked into my parents bedroom, and as I did so, heard a metallic ckkkkkkc (perhaps I kicked something on the ground and didn't realize it or see it?) and heard this faint whirring sound, like someone breathing a little heavily. I walked into my parents' bathroom, didn't see anyone, but didn't exactly try to discover anyone, either. It really creeped me out, though. That dream of me waking up and someone being in the house, then me waking up for real and it really seeming like someone was in the house. Perhaps it's not such a great idea for me to stay here alone while my parents are in Mobile for almost a week, after all. Either that, or James will be sleeping over nightly. On the couch, of course.
Relating that dream is now creeping me the hell out, as it is pitch-black in my living room now, and everyone else is asleep (crazy!).
Eaugggghhh, I wish I wasn't so weird lately and could sleep and hold food. Damn.
aigre-douce at 11:24 p.m.