2003-05-05

I kissed you in a style Clarke Gable would have admired

�Clarke Gable� /// The Postal Service

I was waiting for a cross town train in the London underground

When it struck me

That I�d been waiting since birth to find a love that would look and sound

Like a movie

So I changed my plans

I rented a camera and a van

And then I called you

�I need you to pretend that we are in love again�

and you agreed to

I want so badly to believe

that there is truth that love is real

and I want life in every word

to the extent that its absurd

I greased the lens and framed the shot

Using a friend as my stand in

The script it called for rain

But it was clear that day

So we faked it

The marker snapped

And I yelled

�quiet on the set�

and then called �action�

and I kissed you in a style Clarke Gable would have admired

I thought it classic

I want so badly to believe

that there is truth that love is real

and I want life in every word

to the extent that its absurd

I know you�re wise beyond your years

Do you ever get the fear

That your perfect verse is just a lie

You tell yourself to help you get by

/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/

Everything is going to be okay, I have a plan to make it so. Kim got pulled over and was issued a 'citation' for $110, Dusty thinks, and her parents found it this morning...which means no more car for Kim. But it's okay, I'm going to tackle Bethanie and we'll take care of it. If Miss Bethanie gives me sass, though, it's all over b/c I'm more than fed up as it is. Plus, it's not like Kim was driving us back to E-town out of sheer pleasure or out of (her own) necessity (or mine, at that hour, but I'll let it rest). So, hopefully Lauren saves the day. Lauren also hasn't done her FINAL PAPER THAT WAS DUE ON THURSDAY, but hey....all in due time, right? Haha....yiiiiiikes. It's okay, it's all right. I'll see to it.

I offered Elliott gas money if he would come down Tuesday and go back Wednesday, but it wasn't to be. I suppose it's just not practical/possible, but fantasies usually aren't. Note to self: I'm not living in a fairy tale world, reality is imminent. Dammit. I just want to see him again and spend some time before he goes to Tennessee for the summer. And I wanted him to hold my hand when I got holes punched in me, but I suppose I can find someone else for the job....I just wanted it to be him. No cuddling for me. Which reminds me that there's a certain animal that actually dies (I'm sure there are lots, actually) if it does not get enough physical contact (ie, cuddle) with other animals of its species. I understand that. Saturday night saved me from dying for a while, but not by much. No kisses, nothing else. Just hugs and stuff. Sigggggghhhhhh.

And this song reminds me of Chris and his Robin....and I probably have no business saying that. :

�The district sleeps tonight� Smeared black ink Your palms are sweaty And I�m barely listening To last demands I�m staring at the asphalt wondering What�s underneath Wear my badge�. Wear my badge, a vinyl sticker with big block letters Adhere it to my chest Tells your new friends I am a visitor here I am not permanent And the only thing Keeping me dry You seem so out of context In this gaudy apartment complex The stranger with your door key Explaining that I�m just visiting And I am finally seeing That I was the one worth leaving Well I was the one worth leaving DC sleeps alone tonight You seem so out of context In this gaudy apartment complex The stranger with your door key Explaining that I�m just visiting And I am finally seeing �Well I was the one worth leaving� The district sleeps alone tonight After the bars turn out their lights Descend the art of swerving Into the loneliest evening And I am finally seeing That I was the one worth leaving

aigre-douce at 8:28 a.m.

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