2004-06-27

Sing a song

The songs below this entry have been stuck in my head for the last few days. On another note, James and I are ::on hiatus::. We still are in love, love each other dearly, and I don't need to change my LJ info name from Lauren O to anything else. Just taking a break, and yes, we'll get back together. Everyone needs space sometimes. And yeah, we are still moving to Atlanta together (we just can't bring other ppl home).

It's so weird being back in Enterprise. I mean, I'm so goddamned happy I'm not in Longboat Key anymore (too much to go into, let's just say that won't happen again), but it's odd adjusting to Enterprise, Alabama after being right on a private beach for three weeks. It's mostly the fact that I would go walk on the beach whenever I wanted to talk on the phone or have alone time, and obviously, I can't do that here. The street is just not the same, oddly enough.

It's actually nice being home. I'm not stressed, even. I'm able to appreciate the kids more because even though they're hyperactive and require way too much attention, they're actually pretty great when they want to be, and they're not anything at all like my extremely immature 26 year old cousin, Kenny, with whom I had to spend the last 3 weeks with. Kenny is obsessive-compulsive in the worst way, disgusting, and seriously has the maturity of someone thirteen years old. I'm not going to waste any more words on that, but know that it was not a pleasant experience.

My mom keeps telling me how much she missed me while I was gone, and how much she loves me, etc. The other night I told her that even though James and I are on hiatus, we're still keeping a huge committment to each other that we made a while back, one that does not involve marriage or pregnancy. I told her I would have to tell her about it later, as I didn't want to do that over the phone (tell her about moving to Atlanta). I'm sure she knows what I'm alluding to, especially since I mentioned I'd be going to Atlanta next week. I sat her down tonight to tell her, actually. I told her that I had Big News to tell her, and that she wasn't going to love it, but she was going to have to find out before Friday. I gave her the option of me telling her tonight or later, and she opted for later.

This afternoon my friend David and I went to Dothan, and I hit up Bath and Body Works, because they have a huge sale going on right now. I got a bunch of smelly goodies all for under $10, to include some soap for Mom in her favorite scent. That's right, I'm buttering her up. I love my parents,and I want this all to go well. I even offered to go get them ice cream after they'd climbed into their pajamas and wanted some, but they declined. See? I do try.

Now for the promised stuck-in-my-head songs...I know the lyrics are sad, but they're just too damn catchy.

'I Miss You' Blink-182

Hello there, the angel from my nightmare

the shadow in the background of the morgue

the unsuspecting victim of darkness in the valley

we can live like Jack and Sally if we want

where you can always find me

we'll have Halloween on Christmas

and in the night we'll wish this never ends

we'll wish this never ends

(I miss you, miss you)

Where are you and I'm so sorry

I cannot sleep, I cannot dream tonight

I need somebody and always

this sick strange darkness

comes creeping on so haunting every time

and as I stared I counted

webs from all the spiders

catching things and eating their insides

like indecision to call you

and hear your voice of treason

will you come home and stop this pain tonight

stop this pain tonight

Don't waste your time on me you're already

the voice inside my head (I miss you, miss you)

don't waste your time on me you're already

the voice inside my head (I miss you, miss you)

Don't waste your time on me you're already

the voice inside my head (I miss you, miss you)

don't waste your time on me you're already

the voice inside my head (I miss you, miss you)

Don't waste your time on me you're already

the voice inside my head (I miss you, miss you)

don't waste your time on me you're already

the voice inside my head (I miss you, miss you)

(I miss you, miss you)

'Down' Blink-182

The drops of rain they fall all over

this awkward silence makes me crazy

the glow inside burns light upon her

I'll try to kiss you if you let me

(this can't be the end)

Tidal waves they rip right through me

tears from eyes worn cold and sad

pick me up now, I need you so bad

Down down down down

down down down down

(it gets me so)

down down down down

(it gets me so)

Your vows of silence fall all over

the look in your eyes makes me crazy

I feel the darkness break upon her

I'll take you over if you let me

(you did this)

Tidal waves they rip right through me

tears from eyes worn cold and sad

pick me up now, I need you so bad

Down down down down

down down down down

(it gets me so)

down down down down

(it gets me so)

'I'm Lost Without You' Blink-182

I swear that I can go on forever again

please let me know that my one bad day will end

I will go down as your lover, your friend

give me your lips and with one kiss we begin

Are you afraid of being alone