2003-11-06
more lj drama and background checks
I'm sick and tired of Alabdrama.
I got online to make an entry about how giddy I was that I get to spend tomorrow with James, because believe me, I need it. I remembered James saying he'd updated, so I naturally assumed he meant on LiveJournal, because he's had that longer. So I jump on, and much to my surprise, Josh (James's best friend till recently) had made an entry about how much he hates James, etc. He even made the comment that he hopes James's kidney disease kills him. This is all over Josh owing James $200 for a long time now, and James really needs it now for his trip. Josh has been an ass about it, and so James got tired of his shit and called him out on it.
Here's Josh's entry:
subject: James O'Keefe
good job on that picture in the b'ham kids community (yeah, everyone else go ahead and go laugh at it). just so you know, i was putting $50, maybe even $60, in the mail for you tomorrow. money i NEED to be giving my mother for the $1800 i owe her. but you know, you DID save my ass. it's not $100, but it's what I could come up with. and i MIGHT have been able to send the rest next week before you left. i haven't been around to tell you, though. so, fuck you. i'm keeping the fucking money. if you were my real fucking friend, you would have understood i'm trying to keep shit with my FAMILY intact. with my mom not having faith in me and all, it kinda put a damper on my life. considering she raised me and all. and i was BUSTING MY ASS trying to get some money to pay you. but, i put that aside to try and keep shit with my "best friend" intact and i get it thrown right back in my face.
if i ever see you again, don't expect me to knowledge that you fucking exist. i hope your kidney disease fucking kills you.
and you know what? at least i don't leave my friends in my girlfriend's living room with said girlfriend's little brother while i fuck her in the bathroom. (and, i'm sorry i had to mention that in my journal, James's girlfriend, you're a really fucking awesome person and i've never had a problem with you or anything. but if he's going to be a douchebag, i'm going to be one right back. don't hate me.)
This whole thing is fucking ridiculous. Allison Cole made that pic, btw, James just posted it. If Josh wants to be mad at James, that's fine. I'd be mad, too. I'd be angrier if I was James, but still, I can understand why Josh is pissed. That's fine. But to drag me down just because he's mad at James? Not fucking cool. My business is just that. That had nothing at all to do with being pissed off at James. I mean, for starters, Josh is an internet whore, and has fucked all sorts of girls in James's presence. I won't go there, though. But I am hella angry.
While I'm still seething over that, though, Elliott IMs me to tell me he and his friends (and new girlfriend, whom I was supposed to meet) will not be coming to Enterprise this weekend after all. He was supposed to come by this weekend for us to exchange books, and he'd invited me to lunch. I asked him why, never expecting the answer I received. To make a long story short, Elliott's mom became concerned (after she and Elliott chatted about James, I'm guessing, since Elliott won't tell me, but he knows James hates him), and as she has a lawyer friend in Enterprise, had her do a background check on James, pull up his rap sheets, etc. James has a slight criminal past, which I'm fully aware of and have already taken into consideration before becoming serious with him.....what's in the past is just that. I think I've mentioned that before, though. At any rate, Elliott's mom is now afraid of James, and apparently so is Elliott. She looked it up "because she's worried about me". For one, I am damn tired of people doubting my decisions. Secondly, I just find it creepy that my ex's mom (whether we were close or not) is doing background checks on my boyfriend. Yeah, James hates Elliott, but would never touch him because of me, rather, James's respect for me. Or something to that effect. I'm not upset that Elliott's not coming, just mostly angry because he believes anything his mom says and now I won't be getting my stuff back this weekend.
This has really been a suck-ass week. Drama is never good news. Especially when it's on THE INTERNET. I'm debating whether to lay low, thus making Josh look like the asshole he is, or making a really attacking post.....I settled on just making this comment on Josh's LJ:
You know Josh, I've never had anything against you. In fact, I've stood up for you at times when James's been pissed because I know how much it sucks to be trying to pay people back, or just pay for life in general, and not have any money. I've never done anything, ever, to deserve you spreading my shit on the internet. And I really don't appreciate it. You have a problem with James, that's fine. That's between the two of you. But you want to drag me into this shit? That's pretty fucked up, and I don't put up with shit like that. You obviously must have some sort of problem with me if you're trying to spread shit about my personal life, none of which concerns you.
On a lighter note, Josh's ass is grass, and I get to see James tomorrow. And Nick dedicated this poem he wrote to me, because I am hella angry.
Scream
the terror of twisting
brain knots
is complexity of dirty
synaptic rush.
The headache of life,
love,hate
anger,death,
conception, active,
passive,
and burning Christ halos
opens our minds to an utterance
of vibration. No longer is restraint
truly an option. Only the sudden
rush of serotonin, estrogen, and testosterone,
and residual amino acids can provide
the sweeping, blurred brushstrokes
of ostentatious thought release. All
any of us can truly offer to
each other is genuine scream of
the horror in our hands. Wear
a rage mask of genuine anger
or let your piteous scream escape.
Your hands know your mind. Can your your
lips hide your intent?
What's interesting is that I've been pretty calm (or have tried my damnedest to be) for the past three months or so. But after this week, I don't forsee that happening much longer. I am glad, however, that I have someone to actually have a reason to be angry at, because I sure do have a lot of built-up tension I've been holding back.
Calm down, you know I won't really do anything. But it's always nice to have a scapegoat.
I sincerely hope everyone else's week has been better than mine. Goddamn drama. I need out of Alabama, and fast.
Update, update!
M is for Makeout [2:31 AM]: I'm sorry for putting that in my journal. i took it out.
WeetzieChick [2:31 AM]: k
WeetzieChick [2:31 AM]: thanks
M is for Makeout [2:32 AM]: you're welcome.
aigre-douce at 11:52 p.m.