2004-04-29
It's a long one, so get comfortable.
I do not feel well. My lady parts are cramping against themselves, making me loathe being a female. I have not been this sick with my period in at least a year. I even got out of going to church last night because of it.
It's been one of those weeks that I will remember years from now, one where my parents and I have had a really bad fight, and they're the ones in the wrong for once. Instead of 'they,' perhaps I should just say 'my dad,' since Mom hasn't done anything wrong. And because of this fight, I have told them (Mom, at least, I suspect Dad knows, but I have not yet told him) James and I are moving in together in Mobile, and will be gone this coming week, apartment shopping.
Here's what happened: James was driving home from Atlanta on Sunday night when he decided that rather than going home, he would just get a hotel room in Enterprise and stay the night there. He picked me up on his way into town, got the room, and we spent some time together. We exchanged gifts we'd gotten for each other while he'd been on his trip (He bought me some kickass clothes), and we caught up. Due to his spending the day at Six Flags and driving from Atlanta, he was dead tired. So when it was time for me to go home, I suggested I take the car and drive myself home, then pick him up in the morning. We agreed, and I went home. I wrote my parents a note on a large, bright melon sticky note that said 'James DID NOT spend the night; I just have the car,' and left said note on the cabinet they'd see as they entered the kitchen from their room. Happy, I went to bed.
At 6:45 the next morning, I was awoken with the phone ringing - my dad calling from work. In a low, threatening voice, he asked if James had spent the night last night. I told him he had not, and he would already know this, had he read the note I left him. He then said, "If James ever spends the night, or if I find out you ever screw in my house, I�ll blow his fucking head off, do you understand?" I said, "Yeah, I understand you're disgusting! I wouldn't do that anyway, because I do try to respect your rules." He said, "No you don't. There are rules we've made that you break, and I know about it." I asked him what he was in reference to, and he said, "Screwing." My dad, who is a nurse, yelps "TMI!" if I even mention I'm cramping because I'm on my period, yet he wants to use the word screwing with me? I think not. I told him that he could not tell me what to do with my own body, as it is my body, and that what I did, I did so responsibly. Also, I'm not the only non-virgin child my parents have, and they know that. They don't hate the other one for it though, just me, despite the fact that I'm 19 and in a relationship, and the other child is not even 16, and has gotten into trouble with the law about it, and not only that, was NOT in a relationship with the person involved. But anyway, back to the story.
He then went on to say that he's been wanting to ban James from the house anyway, until James proves to him that he's doing something with his life. Ahem, James was in the Marines for 3 years, is currently adjusting to having a kidney disease and being a civilian, and planning on going to college, even though he doesn't want to. My dad doesn't approve of me having a serious relationship with James anyway, which you, the reader, already know. So why then, should James have to prove anything to him, anyway? What difference will it make? None. I told him I was not aware I had to keep him up-to-date on every decision James made about his life, but for the record, he is planning on going to college. To which Dad Lloyd replied, "Well, I happen to know he's been out of the Marines long enough to have gotten into college....." Um, yeah, he knows that because I told him, and you can't just jump into a college in the middle of a semester. Not only that, but choosing a college, and preparing for it and everything takes a little bit of time. But that's not really the point, is it? I pointed out to him that it's not really his business, and he said, "When you live in your own place, you can do whatever you like, until then....." During the course of the conversation, he started to realize that he'd acted rashly, and that had he read the note I left for him right out in the open, this all would have been nipped in the bud. What I liked about this conversation: As much as he hated it, if he didn't like something I said, it's not like he could come over and beat the shit out of me, because we were on the phone. At the end of the conversation, he apologetically said that next time I left him a note, would I please tape it to the cappuccino maker, since that's the only thing he'd see while he's still blind in the morning. We hung up.
Going back to sleep was not an option, so furious, I went to talk to Mom. I opened the door, and said, "Just for the record, no, James did not spend the night here, and no, we don't "screw" in your house. Mom, taken aback, asked what was going on, and I told her everything that was said. I told her how angry I was that Dad spoke to me like that, had no respect for me whatsoever, let alone trust, and would so flippantly threaten James's life, especially when neither of us had done anything wrong. I told her that James and I have been planning on moving in together in Mobile for some time now, and that we'll be gone this coming week to Mobile, apartment shopping. This did not surprise her (nor should it have, as many hints I've thrown her way), and she said, "I'm sorry everything had to happen like this, Lauren." In fact, surprisingly, she was sympathetic with me! I was very surprised. I cried a little, and told her it would make me sad to have to get new pets. I do so love Nicholas and Alexandra. I really hate someone randomly threatening me, especially first thing in the morning. And Dad's all about randomly blowing up (usually over absolutely nothing) and threatening me.
I picked James up that morning, and told him what happened. He just soothed me, but wasn't surprised. He checked out of the hotel, we searched for breakfast foods, ended up getting bagels, cream cheese, and spray butter (for me) at Wal Mart, and got another hotel room. He wasn't feeling well (thanks, Scene Josh, for getting him sick), and really didn't want to go home. And after that fight that morning, there was absolutely no way I was going to be home that evening. I called Mom and told her I was spending the day and night with Kim (lie), went home, and packed up enough clothing and toiletries for the rest of the week, then played Wife, picking up food and medicine for James. We spent the majority of our time in bed (sleeping, not sexing), just hanging out and watching movies on HBO. And I loved it, because it was like our own little world, away from any and everybody else. We bought Church's and more gas station food for dinner and snacks, and continued our mini-vacation.
Tuesday James had his monthly kidney (excuse me, renal) doctor appointment, and for the first time, I went with him. It wasn't until 3:00, so after checkout, we hung out a little while at his house. I walked in the door, and his father was sitting on the couch (futon, actually) right besides the door. Now, understand that I'd dyed my hair a darker shade of red (unintentionally darker, but obviously darker) and highlighted my hair on Saturday night. No one besides my family, to include Seth and Soren, whom I've known for years noticed. When I pointed it out to James, he said he thought it was a little darker, but couldn't tell a big difference. So, when I walked into James's house on Tuesday, imagine my surprise and delight (not to mention the giggles I had making fun of James later for it) when the first thing out of James's dad's mouth after hello was, "I notice you changed your hair again." I sputtered, then laughed that James hadn't even noticed, and his dad winked at me and said, "Yes, but I'm a trained observer." I love his dad. And I thought that was hilarious. I've yet to quit ragging him about it.
While we were just hanging out, I checked out the Apartment Finder for Mobile, and there are some beautiful and affordable (!!) apartments right near the USA campus. However, to up my GPA, I may take some JUCO bump courses first, but it won't be too bad. I'm excited.
We went to his appointment, and I must confide that I think it made James really happy that I went. He said from now on, he wants me to go with him to his appointments. I felt/feel very special. James was put on a lower dose of Predizone (sp?), the medicine he has to take that has REALLY bad side-affects. I had intended to ask his doctor some questions, but as soon as he turned to me and asked if I had any questions for him, I was so taken aback (b/c I hadn't said anything the entire time), that I completely forgot. I'm glad I went, though, because now I know exactly what James goes through when he goes to his appointments, and next time I can remind him to take his medications with him (haha).
After the appointment, we went to the new Thai place in Dothan. It has a really bad location, and doesn't look too impressive from the outside. However,once you walk inside, you're impressed with the attractive modern decor. The food was delicious, and the service, wonderful. James had the coconut chicken, and I had the curry shrimp. We shared.
James was still feeling ill after lunch/dinner, so he dropped me off. Mom had surprised me with a tiny bromeliad, something I've been wanting and hunting for a while now. Kim bought me one for my birthday last year, but I didn't know how to care for it, and it died. However, I kept the pot it came in; Kim had hotglued a hot pink garter around the pot. Mom even put the new bromeliad in my garter pot and placed it on my windowsill! I thought that was pretty awesome. Also, I took it as a sign she wasn't angry about the moving news.
I had a message from Allison about hanging out that night, and she came over late that night, and we watched Love Actually, since I hadn't seen it yet. That movie is wonderful. While waiting for Allison to show up, I checked my email for the first time in days. Apparently Dad had emailed me an apology for "jumping to conclusions". He even signed it "Love, Dad." Yeah, I'm still moving, but at least he apologized, right? My dad NEVER apologizes for anything, so I was quite impressed. I even emailed him an acceptance of the apology, along with a request for the tax information.
So, that's been my week. That, and being sick in bed all day with Kryptonite cramps. Also, I finished The True and Outstanding Adventures of the Hunt Sisters, which was rather good.
aigre-douce at 2:35 p.m.